MANIFESTO: CANCEL CANCEL CULTURE
Ironic yes? The title of this piece of writing is intentionally cheeky because, well I think it’s time to make a little bit of fun out of the way we are “progressing.” You see, I see us regressing. And I’ve lived through some years. I’m not saying I’m old. Well, maybe I’m just old enough. I’ve graduated from college, I’ve been married for quite a while, I have four children and I still use a double space bar after a period. While I don’t claim to be an expert in too many things, I do have some expertise. Not in math. Fortunately (or unfortunately, however you look at it) My acting career hasn’t taken me to the point of fame and because I don’t have any huge movie credits, or millions of followers, I feel just brave enough to make my opinion known without fear of having everything I’ve worked for taken away from me. Still, I expect to get hate for this.
Recently, and without knowledge of the controversy, I watched the movie “Music” created by well known singer Sia. Without knowing of the backlash and call to cancel her new movie, I was blown away by how good it was. It was a unique and beautiful creation dealing with love, loss, passion, joy, and heartache. The film tackled tough subject matter: alcoholism and drug addiction, abandonment, death, disease, disability, familial love, forgiveness, responsibility, and redemption. I found the use of color, costume design, music, dance, use of facial expressions, light, and movement visually interesting and appealing. I was moved by the creative idea to take a look “inside the colorful and beautiful mind” of a non verbal autistic individual in order for those of us who are not autistic to imagine what it might be like. This, of course, is speculation on Sia’s part as I don’t have knowledge of her being diagnosed on the spectrum, though I admit I do not know that information. I was surprised and impressed with how well the young professional dancer and actor Maddie Ziegler could use movement and facial expressions to convey a non verbal autistic individual. I thought her performance was brave and vulnerable and I could see how she worked to get it just right, likely wanting a valid and realistic portrayal. I was delighted with the quality of acting and dancing performance by Leslie Odom Jr, and Kate Hudson and thought highly of the singing quality of Kate Hudson’s voice. I immediately understood why this movie would have been nominated for Golden Globes.
To my surprise a series of angry people in the Autistic community began to create petitions to cancel the film, calling it a disgusting display and slamming Sia for the use of a neurotypical actor playing that of a neuroatypical character. I then went on to read through hate comments, the description of the petition to cancel the film, and derogatory comments on Sia and Maddie’s instagram feeds. I dove a bit deeper and read more statements from Sia on her claim to have done three years of research, the organizations she contacted and worked with, the neuroatypical people she did indeed work with, and yes, some of the insults she publicly hurled on her Twitter feed. I surmise those insults came from a place of where all nasty public comments come from, a place of hurt.
My expertise and why I feel compelled to write about this comes in here. I have been an actor for many years working in full feature and short films (likely nothing you’ve heard of) many commercials, industrials, short episodic content, print jobs and voice over work. As of the last few years I finally found the courage to write, direct and produce my own short film, followed closely by an even shorter second, and some extremely short form content there after. I have been writing a full feature script for the last couple of years and working up the courage to make the thing. It deals with falling in love and with loss. It deals with Cancer, and Dementia. I don’t think it will be possible to cast someone with Dementia. In fact, I never even thought to do so. So this controversy and backlash with Sia’s movie (which almost certainly has the use of far more money to make a film than I could ever dream of, and what I thought to be such an accomplished piece of art) stopped me in my tracks. I was floored by the hatred and anger toward her when I had seen the movie and thought of it as a creation born of love and inclusion. I saw it as an attempt to draw us into the world of autism and care taking, and the trials and difficulties that may come with it. I saw it as a way to fuse music, color, and dance in an unseen world, with the reality of the world we all live in. The reality of our world is loss, and substance abuse, and feelings of regret, and selfishness, and disappointment, and pain. The reality of our world is also joy, new love, understanding, overcoming challenges, and beauty in the simplest things like a snow cone.
I posted about how good I thought the movie was on my instagram page, and in just minutes with my tiny little thousand followers from mostly the midwest, I had people who wanted to discuss why it was wrong. I engaged in these discussions and felt grateful for the opportunity. I also had people in the disabled community who were angry and hurt hurl insults at me for condoning the movie with comments like, “You don’t know anything about being autistic so you can’t write about what I’m offended by.” and “Do you also believe in blackface?”
I can certainly understand the disabled community wanting representation in films and tv shows. I believe we have come a long way from the days of blackface. I see more representation and authenticity in movies being made today than ever before. That doesn’t mean we don’t have farther to go, it simply means we are headed in the right direction. My point is this: casting a non verbal autistic person in the role of “Music” would have made what the movie currently is now, not possible. Without the use of Maddie, who is (from what we know) able bodied and neurotypical, you wouldn’t have been able to see this particular story unfold in the way that it did. That is not to say there couldn’t be a different movie which turned out spectacularly, with an autistic individual in the lead role. It just wouldn’t be what Sia created “Music” to be. These are hard truths, and unpopular things to say. I urge you, whoever is wanting this film canceled, to make your own film and hire neuroatypical actors. I would love to see what you made and I would sincerely be rooting for your success. We need less canceling, and more CREATING.
I have a somewhat unique perspective as I have done physically and emotionally challenging roles with long hours and a high demand for a very specific creative vision. I have put together teams of people to work with and even with the deepest respect for each other, still had moments of disagreement and discord, people being overworked and overtired, and people unable to give anymore of themselves. Making a film is incredibly difficult even with all the resources you need. And portraying something very specific is not easy to do. The directors/filmmakers, professional actors, and professional dancers have to admit these truths. Disability means just that. There are certain things that disabled people have infinitely more trouble with than able bodied or able minded people. When Sia said she attempted to work with an autistic actor and felt it exhausting and too difficult and that she didn’t feel up to the task, it resonated with me. When Sia said she felt like demanding these types of hours, performances and tasks from a disabled person seemed abusive, it resonated with me. I have not only found myself emotionally and physically drained by certain requirements in my performances, I have seen an abusive side of it. Yes, maybe Sia wasn’t willing to give up a specific vision of what the movie would be and cast a neurotypical and able bodied well known collaborator. And maybe you disagree with that. But I believe “canceling” her film is wrong.
And finally, though I don’t refer to my condition as a disability I have in the past been very disabled by it. I have severe Rheumatoid Arthritis and when it first manifested, and while I was pregnant with each of my four children, I was so debilitated by it I could barely make it up or down a flight of stairs or lift a heavy pan. If I had been offered a physically demanding role before I was in a medical remission it would have been physically impossible for me to do. And that’s only one small part of it. If I weren’t exactly what the director was looking for, and my acting ability wasn’t up to a certain standard, that would be yet another reason for me not to get the role. Again, hard truths and unpopular opinions. We as a society have become so steeped in cancel culture. There seems to be this obnoxious and constant need to pick everything apart, be offended by it, and ban together like an angry mob to destroy it. I feel that means we are REGRESSING. When we look at a film made to spread love and goodness, and with no ill intentions by the filmmaker, and still we try to cancel it, how will we ever expect anyone in the world to feel brave enough to make anything at all? I urge anyone who was offended by this movie to give grace to the creator as I believe her only intention was to create a piece of art that showed love and inclusion. I urge anyone at all who ever expects to receive any grace for anything at all throughout life, to give it. And I especially urge you to CREATE instead of HATE. Make things that are important to you. My hope for you is when you put it out into the world, no one will try to cancel you.